Thanksgiving 2006 is a special year in regards to celebrating Turkey
Day. For Thanksgiving 2006 there will be an all new Macy's Thanksgiving
Parade, new football teams playing and new trouble to get in my
In fact, Thanksgiving 2006 just cries out for some good old sophomoric
humor like no other year in a long time has.
In 2006, we have many things to be thankful for including Nicole
Richie enjoying a liquid turkey dinner while in anorexia rehab,
Madonna feeding turkey to an African orphan while its father starves,
gasoline prices have risen more than a buck a gallon and JonBenet's
false confessor goes free and joins his family for a big meal and
a few rounds of "Son, what were you thinking?"
Yes, Thanksgiving 2006 will definitely be one that will be remembered.
At the dinner table kids will give thanks that they're not a Congressional
Page, that the priests this year are keeping their hands to themselves
and that they are now required by law to tell their abusive parent
every time they go to the doctor.
Yes, for Thanksgiving 2006, we will give thanks to escalating violence
in Bagdad, a border that is leaking illegal immigrants like a sieve
and oddly enough "Talk Like A Pirate Day." Other items
for which to be thankful for Thanksgiving 2006 include no Social
Security reform, higher taxes, lower wages and a decline in the
In fact, for Thanksgiving 2006 we will also be thankful for North
Korea's nuclear testing, Iran's nuclear proliferation, Venezuela's
loathing of our President and the social experiment on this season's
opening episodes of "Survivor". Thanksgiving 2006 seems
to have it all. But, wait, there's more.
During our Turkey Day prayer for Thanksgiving 2006 we can count
some of our additional blessings including the Rush Limbaugh versus
Michael J. Fox conflict, the November elections and the movie "Who
Killed the Electric Car?" Other items to be thankful for include
Mel Gibson's outburst, prescription drug addiction and the fact
that leprosy is actually making a comeback.
Yes, my friends and kiddies, Thanksgiving 2006 is a grand year
to give thanks for all the wealth and bounty that surrounds us.
Say a Thanksgiving prayer,
recite a poem and then have a whiskey sour to get you through
the day and brace again for Thanksgiving
2007 because its just around the corner.